“Sister Mary was much loved at Fordham, and by everyone who knew her,” said Joseph M. McShane, S.J., president of Fordham. “She was a guiding light to our alumni, especially the Marymount alumnae, and of course a dear friend and confidant to her fellow sisters of the Religious of the Sacred Heart of Mary. The Fordham family mourns with Sister Mary’s loved ones and friends, and with the many alumni who knew her company, our grief leavened with the knowledge that she surely rests with the Lord today.”

Sister Mary was known for her service to others. As Marymount alumnae chaplain at Fordham, she tended to the spiritual, social, and educational needs of her fellow alumnae. She went wherever she was needed to support those in crisis, traveling as far as Zambia and Zimbabwe. And she did it all with warmth, humor, and patience, said her colleagues and loved ones. 

“In this day and age, we’re quick to find faults in people,” said Michael E. Griffin, Fordham’s associate vice president for alumni relations and executive director of the alumni association. “Mary was somebody who always found the good.”

Sister Mary, previously known as Sister M. Gailhac, was born on August 6, 1940, in New York City to Carl and Florence Heineman Heyser.

As a child, she was shy, athletic, and “a bit of a tomboy,” said her older sister, Sally Heyser Ryan, MC ’58. They lived on the Long Island Sound, where Sister Mary enjoyed swimming and playing tennis. When they grew up and Ryan had five children of her own—and, eventually, 14 grandchildren—Sister Mary was very fond of them, Ryan said. 

“She was my only sister,” Ryan said. “I’m going to miss talking to her weekly and hearing about all the good work she was doing.” 

In 1962, Sister Heyser graduated from Marymount College in Tarrytown, New York, where she received a bachelor’s degree in social studies/science and economics. At age 24, she entered the Religious of the Sacred Heart of Mary in Tarrytown. She spent the next four decades working in ministries across the globe, from her home state to the African continent. From 2003 to 2009, she served as a provincial councillor of the Eastern American Province of the Religious of the Sacred Heart of Mary. 

From 2009 to 2018, she served as the Marymount alumnae chaplain in the Development and University Relations (DAUR) division. 

“She would always start the day by coming to our section of the office and saying hi to everybody,” said Shannon Quinn, associate director of alumni relations. “She would bring up something or other that she knew about you and check in on you.” 

Quinn recalled Sister Mary’s great collection of “snazzy” floral blazers, her opportune sense of humor, and her penchant for Planter’s Punch cocktails. She said Sister Mary taught her three lessons: to assume good intentions in others, incorporate joy in all things, and lead a balanced life. 

“The best thing—and something that probably a lot of people would say about Mary—is that knowing her made you a better person. Because you couldn’t be around Mary … without taking to heart her kindness of spirit,” said Quinn. 

She was a “bright light” who loved the color pink and saw the positive side of things, said Jane Bartnett, MC ’76, former president of the Marymount Alumnae Board. At alumnae board meetings, she delivered thought-provoking prayers that were relevant to world events. And she was a “healing factor” for many Marymount alumnae, including those who were still unhappy that the college, located on the Hudson River in Tarrytown, had to close in 2007.

“She really helped bring Marymount into the Fordham family,” Bartnett said. 

At Fordham, she delivered the opening prayers for many big events, including 2015 Commencement and a Washington, D.C. alumni chapter event honoring Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor that same year. At the 2015 Marymount Founder’s ceremony at the Rose Hill campus, the school’s alumnae board honored her with the Mother Butler Leadership award in honor of her service. 

Sister Mary’s service extended beyond Fordham. In a 2019 story posted by her religious order, she described what it was like to assist refugees at the Annunciation House, a volunteer-run sanctuary in El Paso, Texas. She drove to local bus terminals and an airport, where she helped refugees receive their tickets. She made peanut butter jelly sandwiches, packed food bags for the refugees, and served meals on site. Although she wasn’t fluent in Spanish, she struck up conversations through a Google translation app. Sometimes, she worked as long as 11 hours. 

“Mary was a woman who was passionately committed to ministry. She was willing to go anywhere and do anything,” said Catherine Patten, R.S.H.M, MC ’61, a fellow sister and a friend. “She had this great sense of mission and great care for the poor, immigrants, and people who are most in need, wherever she was.” 

Sister Mary also spearheaded grassroots efforts against human trafficking. She was featured in the book If Nuns Ruled the World: Ten Sisters on a Mission (Open Road Media, 2014) that described how she, along with six sisters from other New York congregations, formed a powerful coalition in 2005. 

“[She] became the glue for the group that would be known as NY-CRC-STOP: New York Coalition of Religious Congregations to Stop Trafficking of People,” wrote the book’s author, Jo Piazza, an award-winning reporter and editor. 

The group organized two Fordham conferences on human trafficking. Through the STOP Coalition, she helped raise funds for LifeWay Network to open its first safe house and assisted in opening two more safe houses in the New York City region. She served on the LifeWay Board for eight years. 

Last year, she moved to Immokalee, Florida, to begin a new ministry in immigration advocacy. Shortly before her death, she returned to the Marymount Convent in Tarrytown, where she received hospice care.

“She brought so much strength and joy to her role in building the bond between the Marymount College and Fordham University communities,” said Samantha MacInnis, MC ’00, current president of the Marymount Alumnae Board, in an email. “It was impossible not to feel that love and commitment when you were around her.”

She is survived by her sister, numerous nieces and nephews, and the members of her religious community. 

All services will be held at the Marymount Convent Chapel, 32 Warren Avenue, Tarrytown, NY. The wake is scheduled for Wednesday, Nov. 6, from 3:30 to 7:30 p.m. Vigil service begins at 7:30 pm. The Mass of Christian Burial will be Thursday, Nov. 7, at 10:30 a.m. The burial will be at Mount Calvary Cemetery in White Plains. In lieu of flowers, gifts in her name may be made to Religious of the Sacred Heart of Mary, 50 Wilson Park Drive, Tarrytown, NY, 10591.

The tips her guests share are practical, often based on their own life experiences. For example, Bethenny Frankel, the reality TV star and founder of the Skinnygirl brand, emphasized the importance of being financially independent and always prepared for the unexpected.

“She went through a very public and difficult divorce, but because she knew what she owned, learned about investing, and kept working, she came through that experience quite well,” Dagher says.

Real estate mogul and Shark Tank investor Barbara Corcoran told listeners to buy only those investments they fully understand. With many complex products out there, it’s important for women to be clear about where they are putting their money. Another guest, comedian Sandra Bernhard, spoke about the importance of living beneath your means and saving.

“She’s been able to do well financially despite the ups and downs that often come with a career in entertainment,” Dagher says. “She never felt the need to keep up with the Joneses or what’s often the very ‘spendy’ Hollywood/NYC celebrity lifestyle.”

A Holistic View of Wealth

Dagher says the idea for the podcast came to her at a time when more and more women are seeking guidance on how to manage their money.

“There’s an estimated $33 trillion wealth transfer happening in America, and women stand to control a large portion of those assets,” she explains. “Women are inheriting, earning more, and many are generating wealth from their own businesses. They are understanding that they need to take greater ownership of their money and careers.” They generally live longer than their husbands and often assume more control over their finances after a divorce. What’s more, women view wealth differently than men, seeing it more holistically—related to their career, family, and health—and as a way to achieve specific goals, like putting a child through college.

Though most of Dagher’s guests focus on earning and investing, some share stories of personal challenges and triumphs. Bonnie St. John, for example, urged listeners to keep pushing forward when facing life’s difficult obstacles. She spoke from experience: She won silver and bronze medals in the 1984 Winter Paralympics for ski racing despite the fact that her leg was amputated when she was a child.

Meditation expert and author Sharon Salzberg suggested that women take a deeper look at what wealth and happiness really mean. “She led us through a meditation to figure out what we are really striving for,” Dagher says. “She also gave tips on how to come to greater peace with our current financial situations.”

The Alumni Network

Dagher says she was honored to host fellow Fordham alumnae Mary Higgins Clark, FCLC ’79, and Liz Ann Sonders, GABELLI ’90, on the podcast, calling them two of the most “down-to-earth women” she’s interviewed. “Mary is 90 and still writing page-turners, and Liz Ann travels extensively to teach people how to be smart investors. The fact that both still have such a strong work ethic inspires me.”

Although she always wanted to be a writer, a career in journalism wasn’t what Dagher envisioned when she started out at Fordham. Instead, she pursued business, inspired by her late father, William T. Dagher LAW ’54, and grandfather who both had their own businesses, and she also earned an M.B.A. at Fordham.

As an undergraduate, Dagher contributed to The Fordham Ram and later freelanced for Ms. Magazine and Newsday while holding down 9-to-5 jobs. But after taking a career class at her church, she decided to follow her heart and transition from business to writing full time. She landed a position as a reporting assistant at The Wall Street Journal after networking with alumnus Scott Stearns, GABELLI ’02, who was an editor there.

Dagher, a Long Island native, credits her alma mater not only for connecting her with great mentors and lifelong friends but also for meeting her husband. She and Patrick Mormino met at the wedding of mutual friends Deanna Rytell, FCRH ’00, and Bryan Connelly, FCRH ’11, and married five years ago.

An Advocate for Women

In her spare time, Dagher enjoys traveling—some favorite destinations include Iceland, Haiti, Israel, and Turkey—and often her travels are service trips organized by churches, such as a trip to Tanzania, where she volunteered with AIDS orphans. Service is important to Dagher, who also volunteers with LifeWay Network, a Queens-based organization that provides safe houses for survivors of sex trafficking. She became interested in the issue after seeing a documentary on it.

“Human trafficking is a several billion-dollar global business, the second fastest-growing criminal enterprise after drugs,” she says. “There are brothels full of trafficking victims right in midtown and in private residences in Brooklyn. I was appalled and felt I needed to do something.” Dagher speaks to various groups to raise awareness about the crisis, and also does special projects, such as visiting New York City hotels, which are hot spots for trafficking, to educate staff members about warning signs and how they can help.

In addition to hosting the podcast, Dagher is a wealth management columnist at wsj.com and frequently appears on Fox Business, Fox News Channel, and nationally syndicated radio to speak about personal finance. In October, she was a panelist a Fordham’s second annual Women’s Philanthropy Summit.

She says there’s a personal connection to the work she does related to women and wealth. Her mother, Monica Dagher, faced a life-changing experience when she was widowed at a very young age.

“She wasn’t financially savvy when it happened and she had to learn at the worst possible time,” Dagher says. “To her credit, she learned about managing investments and made sure I learned, too.”

What secret to success does Dagher wish to share with other women?

“Follow your dreams sooner than later,” she says. “I’ve found that you have a better chance of success if you follow your passions.”

—Claire Curry

“With tremendous advances in civilization through science and technology, it tempts us to think that slavery is a history long gone,” said Archbishop Benardito Auza, S.T.D, apostolic nuncio and permanent observer of the Holy See to the U.N. “But if you look at the facts you would see that this phenomenon is far from being a diminishing reality.”

The archbishop made the remarks on Feb. 23 at his installation as inaugural holder of Fordham’s Cassamarca Foundation Chair in Migration and Globalization in the Graduate Program in International Political Economy and Development (IPED). The renewable two-year appointment is intended to help Fordham to collaborate with the Holy See and the United Nations on issues of migration and globalization. The archbishop will deliver a spring lecture and hold a fall seminar. IPED students will also have the opportunity to intern at the Holy See Mission to the U.N.

Now serving as Pope Francis’ representative to the U.N., Archbishop Auza has been in the diplomatic service of the Holy See for more than 25 years. He said that human trafficking is being fed by many causes, but particularly poverty.

Just three weeks ago, he said, nine North Americans were arrested in Haiti for attempting to traffic 31 girls, aged 13 to 17. But while the girls were saved, many such victims have no home to return to. That’s because in some cases Haitian parents send their children off to brothels to work.

Recently, he said, nine young girls reported such a situation to the police. And although the girls’ parents were arrested, the brothels remained open for business.

“The reality is that no country is immune to human trafficking,” he said. “These two cases in Haiti are just the tip of iceberg.”

There is plenty of domestic trafficking right here in New York City, said Jayne Bigelsen, GSAS ’11, ’16, vice president of advocacy at Covenant House International and director of anti-human trafficking initiatives at Covenant House New York.  She sat on a panel responding to the archbishop’s talk.

“Technically the people we serve are not trafficked, but in 2017 if your choice is to sleep on the street or have sex for a place to stay, then that’s a kind of trafficking,” said Bigelsen.

She said that most of Covenant House’s clients are ages 16 to 22—about the same age as undergraduates at Fordham.

“Pimps and traffickers are looking for young people—someone easy to exploit, someone who doesn’t have a family, someone easy to control, and someone who has never experienced love.”

Michael Osborn, a special agent with the FBI who once managed the bureau’s Child Exploitation Task Force, said that the public’s perception of those being trafficked can be part of the problem.

“If you’re on a highway and you drive by a prostitute, it’s just a ‘sinner,’” he said. “But if you slow down to 25 miles per hour, you might realize it’s a 12-year-old. If you stop, you realize she’s a victim.”

While the seriousness of domestic child trafficking through prostitution must not be understated, Archbishop Auza said that the horrors of international trafficking include sexual exploitation, harvesting of organs, and more.

“Human trafficking is a $32 billion illegal industry, third only to arms and drugs,” he said.

Most victims are forced into being trafficked, but some see it as the only option amidst the chaos of displacement, he said.

“People grab the blade of the sword because it’s better than grabbing nothing at all,” he said.

—

The event was sponsored by Centesimus Annus Pro Pontifice and the Cassamarca Foundation.  A written summary of the archbishop’s presentation and the panel discussion will be sent to Rome for input at an international conference on human trafficking, to be held at the Vatican on May 18 to 20.

For the last six years, she’s also been a bridge between Marymount College, where she graduated in 1962, and Fordham, which acquired Marymount in 2002. As the University’s current Marymount chaplain, Sister Heyser tends to the spiritual, social, and educational needs of the college’s alumnae.

[She has also been called on to deliver the opening prayers for the 2015 Commencement ceremonies at Rose Hill and for a D.C. alumni chapter’s evening honoring Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor in September 2015.]

On Dec. 6 at a Marymount Founder’s ceremony at the Rose Hill campus, the school’s Alumnae Board will honor Sister Heyser and Sister Margaret Ellen Flannelly, RSHM, with the Mother Butler Leadership award.

Both women have served in the chaplain ministry: Sister Heyser since November 2009 and Sister Flannelly, a former Marymount professor and academic dean, from 2007 to 2009.

Sister Heyser never held administrative posts at the college, but whether she is working against human trafficking or on behalf of the Marymount family, she has always had a knack for making connections.

At Fordham, she makes connections with the Marymount alumnae via monthly newsletters, retreats at Cormaria House, and communications with women who attended the school that Mother Marie Joseph Butler founded in 1907. Part of the job, she said, is listening to alumnae who are still unhappy that the college, located on the Hudson River in Tarrytown, had to close in 2007.

“I listen, because it’s a journey of sadness they have. But I say, look at other women’s colleges that have closed. They have no place to gather, no place to have reunions, no place to have opportunities for educational talks,” she said.

“So we’re very lucky in that sense to have an institution that’s welcoming us and allowing us to be part of the big family.”

When Marymount closed, the alumnae also board started a legacy fund that grants scholarships to Fordham women who have a family member who attended an RSHM school.

Being part of a large Jesuit institution has also given her a platform from which to expand her passion of fighting human trafficking, which afflicts 21 million people around the globe.

She’s on the Coalition of Religious Congregations to Stop Trafficking of Persons (CRC-STOP), which organized two Fordham conferences on the subject. Through the STOP Coalition, she has helped raise funds for LifeWay Network to open its first safe house and to work to open two more safe houses in New York City area. She served on the LifeWay Board for eight years and just recently left that position.

Sister Heyser said the subject resonates deeply with the women in her order. One of the first actions Father Jean Gailhac took when he founded the order with Mother Saint Jean in 1849 was build a shelter for prostitutes and an orphanage for children.

“I look at things that need to be done and try to do them. I may not stay with them forever [as]I invite other people to join me and move on to something else.

“I can’t leave human trafficking issue though. It’s still such a terrible crime,” she said.

Awareness of the problem has been growing, she said, and authorities are beginning to finally focus less on prostitutes and more on johns. But challenges still remain, she said. One challenge is that many people can’t accept the possibility that trafficking could be happening right in front of them.

“It’s that attitude, of ‘Nothing like that happens in my neighborhood, it can’t happen in my building.’ So how do you become alert? You look for signs that persons may not really be in charge of their own lives,” she said.

“They don’t have any papers; they’re not even sure where they live. Maybe there are a lot of men going into a house, or there are a lot of women there. Why are there so many young people there? Just begin to ask the questions.”

If you do see something suspicious, call the National Human Trafficking Resource Center at (888) 373-7888.

It’s a knotty problem that taps into troubling issues of economics, sexuality, and psychology, and fighting it is firmly in line with the teachings of Jesus and of course Mother Butler, she said.

“When Mother Butler founded Marymount, she told the students they should be focusing out to the world ‘You should be somebody who speaks out in society, and knows what’s going on,’” she said.

A new study out of Fordham offers some of the first reliable data on human trafficking in New York City and provides new tools for identifying trafficking victims so they can be helped.

Among its many findings, the study highlights the role of homelessness in forcing young people into “survival sex,” or the trading of sex acts—such as prostitution or stripping—for basic needs such as food or shelter.

“Over and over again we heard, ‘If I had a place to stay, this would have never happened to me,’” said Jayne Bigelsen, director of anti-human trafficking initiatives at Covenant House, the social service agency in Manhattan where the study was conducted.

Bigelsen was one of two principal investigators on the study, along with Stefanie Vuotto, a doctoral candidate in the Applied Developmental Psychology program at Fordham. Out of 174 homeless youth between 18 and 23 years old who were surveyed, nearly one-quarter—or 23 percent—had been trafficked or had engaged in survival sex.

Of those who had performed paid sex acts, 48 percent did so because they lacked a safe place to stay.

“We want people to understand the connection between trafficking and runaway and homeless youth,” said Bigelsen, pointing to the need for more government support for shelters. “We are turning away several hundred [young people]a month and all the other youth shelters in the city are as well, and yet funding keeps getting cut. If you want to stop trafficking, we need to have more services.”

The study was an attempt to measure a problem that is notoriously hard to track, in part because victims are reluctant to discuss it.

Vuotto took the lead in developing and validating the study’s questionnaire, which is couched in explanatory, sensitive, nonjudgmental language designed to elicit truthful answers about a touchy topic and help bring the human trafficking problem out of the shadows.

“There are no reliable statistics in terms of the prevalence of human trafficking, or what it looks like in New York City, probably because it’s very covert in its nature,” Vuotto said.
The questionnaire contains detailed instructions about what to listen for and how to follow up on answers that may indicate trafficking. While other groups have methods for screening trafficking victims, Vuotto’s is the first to be this deeply researched and to be scientifically validated for use in the homeless youth population, said Vuotto’s practicum instructor at Fordham, Ann Higgins-D’Alessandro, Ph.D.

“Developing a reliable instrument that can identify victims so they may be helped is critically important, because human trafficking is such a huge and mostly hidden problem,” she said. Bigelsen, meanwhile, hopes the study will show people that “trafficking does happen here in the U.S.” She also had advice for those who would do something about trafficking: provide help and support to young people in need so they don’t come under the sway of those who would coerce and exploit them.

“If you’re mentoring a homeless kid or an at-risk youth or doing anything like that, you’re helping prevent trafficking,” she said.